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I battled with depression after going broke 3 years ago – Eva Alordiah opens up

Ace Nigerian female rapper, Eva Alordiah has taken to social media to open up about how she went broke, battled depression three years ago and eventually bounced back.

In a lengthy tweet thread, the one-time bubbling Hip Hop act, said that at the time she was broke, depressed and pissed with her existence.

Eva further explained at a point she felt she was living a lie and lost touch with reality and who she was.

According to the ”High” hitmaker who went off the rap radar in 2016, she began communing with her inner mind in order to identify herself, learning about ego and the need to prove to herself that she would be able to live without depending on music or what she was known for (rapping).

In her words;

”3 years ago I was broke, depressed and pissed off with my existence. I stood in front of my mirror one day and broke down crying.

I felt like I was living a lie —I no longer knew who I was & I was going through one of the most painful Ego deaths I had ever experienced..

”I remember yelling at God saying —“What the fuck! What the fuck do you want me to do. Show yourself dammeeet!” —-

I think about it now..

Stupid.

”Talented, Broke, Depressed and tired of Life. Not a good combination to have.

Through many days of journaling & communing with myself, I began to learn about IDENTITY and the Ego. And how I had become Identified with what I did (Rapper).

It was tough for me to be anything else but that, and that pissed me off even more. I wanted to be done with it.

So I said “Fck it! Whatever happens will happen, I just want to be a human being..”

”I needed to prove to myself that I good earn a living without fame, music or whatever else I was identified by.

And that was how my Journey began.

”In 2020 I focused on Learning How to earn money online— I became an active content creator, started a new IG page & shared my knowledge freely.

Then I created Courses & monetized the shit out of my Knowledge. And in the middle of the Pandemic I built http://kobocourse.com Left pointing backhand index

”You’ll never understand what it feels like for me to be able to say —“I know how to earn money without needing to be a music artiste”

To have a business that pays me without stress, to know that I can always get paid— to feel valuable and worthy..

”You’ll never understand

Within 9 months I had earned almost N17,000,000 on IG without stress — in the middle of that win, one mosquito asked me to come perform at a show for N100,000

”You’ll never know the Joy I felt when I said, “No thank you,” and hung up the phone without remorse.

It’s freedom!!

”It’s nice to know that I can still record music when I want, how I want, ‘If’ I want. To have been dependent on my music for survival was also to throw away my Love for the Art.

Today I’m learning how to Rap again, how to listen to music, how to enjoy it without pressure

”I don’t care about Fame or having all the money in the world— all I know is, being able to tell your parents, “Don’t worry, I’ll pay for it” — is a different kind of Level up!…”

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